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PostPosted: Wed Jan 09, 2019 5:14 pm 
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Press 'F' to pay respects.

Q's monumental contest has been waylaid by the nature of computers to fail. Yet here we all are, chomping at the bit, frothing at the mouth, ready to make cards. You dogs! You animals! I come, golden-maned and clear-eyed, to bring you to heel.

For this Dojo, you have two cards to make:
1. Create a multicolored card depicting a non-humanoid animal (fantastical or otherwise. Unicorns count; Vedalken do not).
2. Create a non-colorless card depicting a statue, totem, fetish, bust, figurine, idol, effigy, or bas-relief.

You've got until the END OF THE DAY FRIDAY JANUARY 11 2019! You should know the drill by now. Submit as many times as you want and I'll sort 'em out at the end. You'll get a la carte feedback on up to one (1) of your submissions.

Go! Get after it!

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 09, 2019 5:41 pm 
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Marvelous Mongoose
Creature - Mongoose
Hexproof, Double strike
"What an exciting addition to the petting zoo!" - Gullport Merchant's last words.
2/2

Coated Cast
Artifact
,, pay 1 life: Create a colorless Treasure artifact token with ", sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color."
Some mistake its rusty sheen for corrosion.

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magicpablo666 wrote:
You fell victim to one of the classic blunders - The most famous of which is "never get involved in an thread with GM_Champion" - but only slightly less well-known is this: "Never go in against AzureShade when card design is on the line!"


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 09, 2019 9:02 pm 
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Celestial Beetle
Creature - Insect
1ww: Creatures you control get +1/+1 and gain vigilance until end of turn. You may activate this ability only once per turn.
1bb: Creatures you don't control get -1/-1 and lose all abilities until end of turn. You may activate this ability only once per turn.
3/3
The music of the spheres is played by countless limbs.

Monolith of Enlightenment
Creature - Wall
Defender, indestructible
Whenever a source deals damage to this, that source's controller draws a card.
0/5
There is no greater boon to the advancement of knowledge than the insurmountable.

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Current Season of Chopped
List of Chopped Champions

Previous seasons of Chopped:


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 09, 2019 10:26 pm 
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Identity: BIG BRAINED
feel free to not grade these cards

they're very bad

Noble Panther
Creature - Cat (R)
: Noble Panther gains first strike until end of turn.
Unlike many hunters, these panthers have no need for camouflage. They’re fast enough to catch any prey.
3/3

Blazing Effigy
Creature - Elemental (C)
When Blazing Effigy dies, it deals X damage to target creature, where X is 3 plus the amount of damage dealt to Blazing Effigy this turn by other sources named Blazing Effigy.
0/3

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My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high. It gives me power over all the ignoramuses on this site.
Only a select few in the universe could possibly hold a conversation with me without getting confused. This is because I discuss things like quantum physics, black holes and time and space themselves.
Jealous? I would assume so. Move along now, unless you have an IQ of over 190 I don't wish to communicate with you on any level. I could take any and all of you in a fight.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 09, 2019 11:04 pm 
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You dogs! You animals!


*woof*

Faithful Companion -
Creature - Hound Spirit
When Faithful Companion enters the battlefield, if you cast it from your hand, put a loyalty counter on another creature you control.
At the beginning of your end step, if a creature you control has a loyalty counter on it, return Faithful Companion from your graveyard to the battlefield tapped.
Some dogs always find their way home.
2/1


Ancestral Figure -
Creature - Dinosaur Skeleton
Ancestral Figure enters the battlefield with a number of +1/+1 counters on it equal to the number of creature cards in all graveyards.
At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a +1/+1 counter from Ancestral Figure and gain 3 life.
In hindsight, the animals all agreed that allowing Cardinal Ruffington to be in charge of the sacred bones was a mistake.
0/0


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 3:20 am 
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Plated Familiar
Creature - Armadillo
Hexproof
Whenever Plated Familiar blocks, it has base power and toughness 0/4 until end of turn.
"I haven't really found a use for him yet, but I know he won't be kicking the bucket before I do."
-Anton, spell-weaver adept

2/2

Living Statue
Creature - Elemental
Indestructible
At the beginning of your end step, put a -1/-1 counter on Living Statue if it attacked this turn.
"Truthfully, I just chiseled King Tyndareos's face into a golem passing by, but at least the protection runes seem to be working."
-Bedardos, royal architect

3/3


Last edited by Malikot on Thu Jan 10, 2019 2:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 7:45 am 
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Darctar Prowler
Creature - Manticore
When Darctar Prowler enters the battlefield, each opponent gets a poison counter.
At the beginning of each opponents' upkeep, that player may pay 1 life for each poison counter they have. If they dont, they get a poison counter.
Not all poisons need be painful, and not all prey need be devoured whole.
[4/4]

Brimstone Effigy
Artifact
, Pay 2 life: Each opponent gets a poison counter.
"Through this effigy
There is only
Misery"
--Inscription


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 9:01 am 
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Firefox -
Creature - Fox
Vigilance
Whenever ~ becomes blocked, it deals 1 damage to the defending player.
2/1


Totem of the Fox -
Artifact
: Tap target creature you control with power 2 or less and remove it from combat


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 9:03 am 
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Darctar Prowler
Creature - Manticore
When Darctar Prowler enters the battlefield, each opponent gets a poison counter.
At the beginning of each opponents' upkeep, that player may pay 1 life for each poison counter they have. If they dont, they get a poison counter.
Not all poisons need be painful, and not all prey need be devoured whole.
[4/4]

Spiralling Addiction
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant player
At the beginning of enchanted player's upkeep, that player may gain a Poison counter. If they don’t, they lose 1 life for each Poison counter on them.
"There, there, dear. The first few doses may have to be force-fed, but soon... soon you will crave for the stuff." - Sar, Agent of Elesh Norn.

Coincedence?

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nice quotes from this forum


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 10:23 am 
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Darctar Prowler
Creature - Manticore
When Darctar Prowler enters the battlefield, each opponent gets a poison counter.
At the beginning of each opponents' upkeep, that player may pay 1 life for each poison counter they have. If they dont, they get a poison counter.
Not all poisons need be painful, and not all prey need be devoured whole.
[4/4]

Spiralling Addiction
Enchantment - Aura (R)
Enchant player
At the beginning of enchanted player's upkeep, that player may gain a Poison counter. If they don’t, they lose 1 life for each Poison counter on them.
"There, there, dear. The first few doses may have to be force-fed, but soon... soon you will crave for the stuff." - Sar, Agent of Elesh Norn.

Coincedence?


Old Scratch
Legendary Creature - Demon Manticore
You cannot lose the game for having 0 or less life. At the beginning of your end step, Old Scratch loses this ability unless you pay 4 life.
: Regenerate Old Scratch. Your life total becomes X.
The best venom doesn't need to be painful; only deadly.
[4/4]


Effect yes; flavor somewhat ... debating on changing my submission now


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 12:42 pm 
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Beached Whale
Creature - Whale (R)
Defender
At the beginning of your upkeep, create a 1/1 green and white human spectator token.
Tap three untapped spectators you control: Transform Beached Whale.
8/8
\\\\\\\\\\
Majestic Giant of the Deep
Creature - Whale (R)
Trample
Spectators get +1/+1.
8/8

Bleached Whalebone Totem
Artifact (R)
: Add or to your mana pool.
Morbid - : Create a 1/1 black and blue spirit creature token with flying.
It gave to them in death what it was ultimately unable to give itself in life.

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SithasLore, White, Blue, Black, Red, Green, Multicolored, Artifacts, Lands
Sithas: Rising StormsLore, White, Blue, Black, Red, Green, Multi, Artifacts and Land
Ephemeron


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2019 1:34 pm 
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about fourteen more hours for this one, come and get after it

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2019 1:51 pm 
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Monstrous Tardigrade |
Creature - Beast | {U}
If Monstrous Tardigrade would be destroyed, tap it. It gains Indestructible until the end of your next turn, and doesn't untap during your next untap step.
[5/5]

Line of Conquerors |
Legendary Artifact - Edifice | {R}
(You may attack and target Edifices as though they were planeswalkers, except they lose structure counters instead of loyalty counters.)
5+ : Creatures you control get +1/+1.
2—4 : Creatures you control get +1/+1 and vigilance.
1 : Creatures you control get +1/+1, vigilance, and first strike.

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"If you refuse to use rock, you will never beat scissors." — Galef, Dakka Dakka Forums


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:15 pm 
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Spellthief Gibbons
Creature - Monkey
Whenever an opponent would cast a spell that targets only one creature, you may copy that spell. The copy targets Spellthief Gibbon.
3/4

Memorial to the Late King
Enchantment
When Memorial to the Late King enters the battlefield, exile target creature. At the beginning of its controller's upkeep, they gain 1 life.
Cycling
It would have made for a very splendid monument, had it not been soaked in his blood.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2019 3:43 pm 
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this is [Closed], grades before end of day Monday. happy weekend to all

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2019 4:25 pm 
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Just realized my second first submission doesn't fit the criteria. I swear I meant to make my gibbons cost , if that means anything


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2019 4:54 pm 
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are you sure you didnt mean for it to cost ?

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My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high. It gives me power over all the ignoramuses on this site.
Only a select few in the universe could possibly hold a conversation with me without getting confused. This is because I discuss things like quantum physics, black holes and time and space themselves.
Jealous? I would assume so. Move along now, unless you have an IQ of over 190 I don't wish to communicate with you on any level. I could take any and all of you in a fight.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2019 5:30 pm 
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That was a close second tbh, but I felt I couldnt rightly justify the snow mana


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2019 1:26 pm 
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@Malikot I'm going through these now; do you want me to consider the Gibbons as being costed ? I'll assume you do unless you let me know before the nebulous time this afternoon at which these grades will be done

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 14, 2019 2:18 pm 
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make it so, daddy-o

unless seems like a better alternative, then maybe you can cheat that in for me after all


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