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PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2020 12:04 am 
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Oh, and status update, only got just shy of 2000 words today, not as much progress as I'd hoped. Part of that was a minor editing pass, but I'm at the stage of ending the first act now, in a few hundred words.
Also worked out portions of the outline for the third act that had been giving me trouble.

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At twilight's end, the shadow's crossed / a new world birthed, the elder lost.
Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind.
To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 18, 2020 11:48 pm 
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So, today's progress on the Jakkard story amounted to fixing one bad line I was highly dissatisfied with. And that was it, really.

As I'm working on this one,I'm finding it hard to grapple with the proper language cadence and form. Since the character voices are stylised, with the Cowboy Dialect, I'm second guessing myself a lot on how much it's acceptable that the prose itself is being shaped by the bleed over of the dialogue.

I'm also fretting that the unique voices aren't really standing out because of the colloquialism and nature of the aesthetic medium.

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At twilight's end, the shadow's crossed / a new world birthed, the elder lost.
Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind.
To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 19, 2020 12:27 am 
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Progress is progress!

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 25, 2020 2:24 am 
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New phone, who dis?

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At twilight's end, the shadow's crossed / a new world birthed, the elder lost.
Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind.
To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 25, 2020 9:31 am 
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Barinellos wrote:
New phone, who dis?

Dis is a Roman god of the underworld.

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 25, 2020 4:14 pm 
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Barinellos wrote:
New phone, who dis?

Dis is a Roman god of the underworld.

Thank you.

On a tangentially related note, I've been playing Hades. Love the art and the writing, the gameplay is cool but is subtly draining for my brain so I have to more or less schedule playing sessions to avoid a subtle but obnoxious kind of mental exhaustion.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2020 8:14 pm 
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Through completely unrelated means, I heard a small bit about trademark law that made me realize how off-base I was with my earlier statements. Like, for one thing, trademarks can just be granted as a... I think the term is common law, if the entity is engaging in commerce.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2020 7:13 pm 
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So, I've decided to take the month of November off of all social media. With everything going on, I just really can't take the crap I'm seeing. And, though I'm loath to admit it, I'm not doing very well at the moment. This semester has been the most stressful of my career, and nothing ever seems to get better. So I'm thinking that if I cut out some of the things stealing some brainspace, it would be better for me, so I'm cutting out social media for a month.

Now, I'm strongly debating lumping NGA into that category for this purpose. See, the thing is, in the time I've been involved in the M:EM (which is about eight years at this point), I've never been gone for more than a couple days. Even if I don't post anything for a stretch, I'm still on and checking it every day. I'm not saying I don't like being around here; obviously I do. But I just think I need a break.

Also, more darkly, I'm frankly starting to wonder if I'm part of the problem. I post a lot around here. More than anyone, in fact. And I'm starting to wonder if I'm sort of driving people away. Obviously, I don't want to, and it's counter to what I want to happen around here, but we don't always come across the way we think we do, and I'm thinking I'm maybe a more negative force than I think I am.

Anyway, I'm thinking I could use a month off. I have a Halloween piece written, which I will post on Saturday, and I'll certainly be around until then, but I think it might be healthy, for me and potentially for the project, if I took November off. I haven't made up my mind yet, but I'm definitely thinking November will be energy-saver mode.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2020 10:36 pm 
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Technically this is "social media", but is not what people usually think of when they use the phrase.
I don't imagine that you being here is driving anybody off, so I wouldn't let that factor into your decision.
Really your decision should be based on what you feel is best for you.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2020 10:54 pm 
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The way I see it, you're helping keep the lights on here!

I for one qualify "social media" as the real-name internet, which I largely avoid.

I have been much happier since I dropped all feeds of real life/random from my internet regimen (seeking news if I desire it, not browsing it), limiting my interface to interest, hobby, media, and gaming content.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 1:03 am 
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Now, I'm strongly debating lumping NGA into that category for this purpose. See, the thing is, in the time I've been involved in the M:EM (which is about eight years at this point), I've never been gone for more than a couple days. Even if I don't post anything for a stretch, I'm still on and checking it every day. I'm not saying I don't like being around here; obviously I do. But I just think I need a break.

Also, more darkly, I'm frankly starting to wonder if I'm part of the problem. I post a lot around here. More than anyone, in fact. And I'm starting to wonder if I'm sort of driving people away. Obviously, I don't want to, and it's counter to what I want to happen around here, but we don't always come across the way we think we do, and I'm thinking I'm maybe a more negative force than I think I am.

Dude, I really can't see how that could be true in any capacity.
I've never seen you be all that negative or anything of the sort.
You're one of us (gooble gobble) and if anything I'd say I'm waaaay more of a detriment than you've been.

Quote:
Anyway, I'm thinking I could use a month off. I have a Halloween piece written, which I will post on Saturday, and I'll certainly be around until then, but I think it might be healthy, for me and potentially for the project, if I took November off. I haven't made up my mind yet, but I'm definitely thinking November will be energy-saver mode.

I can certainly respect your choice, so long as you know we'll miss you like hell.
Even if you take a sabbatical, we'll be here waiting when you come back.

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At twilight's end, the shadow's crossed / a new world birthed, the elder lost.
Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind.
To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 1:21 am 
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I just want to come in and agree that it seems highly unlikely that your activity would have pushed anyone away from here. Except possibly the puns. But if a person can't stand a few bad puns, I don't want them in my circle anyway.

But if you need to disconnect for a while, I get it. Heck, I've been absent for months without the courtesy of explaining myself, so I certainly can't judge. I hope things get better soon, in all aspects of life.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 1:29 am 
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I agree with all the above, Raven, take a pause if want/need one, but don't think your activity has ever had a negative effect... which seems an ongoing theme with you lately? Take your time, dude, clear your head and recharge your batteries.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 6:15 am 
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I appreciate the sentiments, everyone. I think it mostly comes from losing so many of the people I was working closest with, like Keeper, Ruwin, and Orcish. Orcish, particularly, I'm worried about, both in and of himself and with regards to me on these boards. He and I were working on a collab and had a few in the bank, too, and I can't shake the feeling that a part of his absence is due to feeling pressure to create something that maybe he doesn't want to create.

Anyway, I think some time off would be good for me. But assuming I'm able, I'll definitely be back.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 6:22 am 
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So I'm thinking that if I cut out some of the things stealing some brainspace, it would be better for me, so I'm cutting out social media for a month.

Now, I'm strongly debating lumping NGA into that category for this purpose.

If you think that will help you, then by all means, take the break you need. Lord knows I've disappeared from here for months at a time. I think it's fairly obvious that we'll all miss you while you're gone, but nobody will hold it against you if that's what you want to do.

If you're asking for permission, then it's definitely granted. If you're asking for advice, I'd say you should consider what else you do when you're on NGA. Like, does lurking and posting here often lead you to checking other sites that you want to cut out? Or are you able to come here in a vacuum, and are you confident you can resist the siren's lure if you kept coming here while avoiding other sites?

Also, more darkly, I'm frankly starting to wonder if I'm part of the problem. I post a lot around here. More than anyone, in fact. And I'm starting to wonder if I'm sort of driving people away. Obviously, I don't want to, and it's counter to what I want to happen around here, but we don't always come across the way we think we do, and I'm thinking I'm maybe a more negative force than I think I am.

Hearing that hurts me; as others have said, your presence, especially given how much you post and how much you write for the M:EM, helps generate some much-needed activity around here. Please don't believe that of yourself.

I wish you well, whatever you decide, and I sincerely hope all of you pull through better than when this all began.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 7:54 am 
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I appreciate the sentiments, everyone. I think it mostly comes from losing so many of the people I was working closest with, like Keeper, Ruwin, and Orcish. Orcish, particularly, I'm worried about, both in and of himself and with regards to me on these boards. He and I were working on a collab and had a few in the bank, too, and I can't shake the feeling that a part of his absence is due to feeling pressure to create something that maybe he doesn't want to create.

Anyway, I think some time off would be good for me. But assuming I'm able, I'll definitely be back.

I can't really speak for Orcish, but I think the sentiment you expressed was more a malaise he felt at just not having created much in a while, added to a health scare that I've only barely kind of pieced together. Then there was stress with his job and moving.
I miss him like hell, but mostly I'd just like to know here's okay.

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At twilight's end, the shadow's crossed / a new world birthed, the elder lost.
Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind.
To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 7:56 am 
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I am a firm believer in not wishing your life away bc you want something to happen sooner.

Thus is one of the rare times I really wish I could skip forward a week.

————-

Internet forums such as NGA definitely count as social media.

————-

Raven I highly doubt the people still here want you to leave, so only do so if you want to do it for you. You are significantly more of an asset to the forum than s detriment imo; and it would be a shame if you left long term.

————-

Disclaimer: Don't listen to mjack33. He’s crazy and his advice is a coin flip.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 3:55 pm 
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If you're asking for advice, I'd say you should consider what else you do when you're on NGA. Like, does lurking and posting here often lead you to checking other sites that you want to cut out? Or are you able to come here in a vacuum, and are you confident you can resist the siren's lure if you kept coming here while avoiding other sites?

I pretty much stay on NGA. It rarely leads me to any other sites.

Also, more darkly, I'm frankly starting to wonder if I'm part of the problem. I post a lot around here. More than anyone, in fact. And I'm starting to wonder if I'm sort of driving people away. Obviously, I don't want to, and it's counter to what I want to happen around here, but we don't always come across the way we think we do, and I'm thinking I'm maybe a more negative force than I think I am.

Hearing that hurts me; as others have said, your presence, especially given how much you post and how much you write for the M:EM, helps generate some much-needed activity around here. Please don't believe that of yourself.

I wish you well, whatever you decide, and I sincerely hope all of you pull through better than when this all began.

I hear what you're saying, and I appreciate the sentiment. I just know that two constants seem to be that we lose good people and that I'm around. I certainly hope it's a false corollary, but I can never know unless our missing friends return and either confirm or deny.

Barinellos wrote:
I can't really speak for Orcish, but I think the sentiment you expressed was more a malaise he felt at just not having created much in a while, added to a health scare that I've only barely kind of pieced together. Then there was stress with his job and moving.
I miss him like hell, but mostly I'd just like to know here's okay.

Yeah, I know, but you never know what primary reasons are, secondary reasons, tertiary reasons and so forth. And you never know what nice people like Orcish won't say to spare feelings. :/

Like you, I just hope things are okay. It makes me so nervous not hearing from people.

mjack33 wrote:
Raven I highly doubt the people still here want you to leave, so only do so if you want to do it for you. You are significantly more of an asset to the forum than s detriment imo; and it would be a shame if you left long term.

Thanks. I appreciate the sentiment.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 5:41 pm 
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I just know that two constants seem to be that we lose good people and that I'm around. I certainly hope it's a false corollary, but I can never know unless our missing friends return and either confirm or deny.

Come the hell on now, I hope you know at some level that you're just talking yourself down because you're having a rough period and you probably have some pesky little brain glitch (maybe plain old burnout?) raising its ugly head. Such a thing isn't particularly helped by logic usually, but if you assert that there are legitimate reasons to think that, please allow me to rebut:

A. There might just be external reasons as to why there's no overturn like
1. Modern MtG flavor may not be as suited to M:EM-friendly people as it was, attracting less new people that might join the project
2. NGA might be less visible than before, leading to less traffic in general
B. Feedback is one of the primary reasons one shares their work. You are one of the most reliable sources of feedback for new stories. To be real, there has been at least one story I wouldn't have bothered to finish if I didn't knew there'd have been at least a person that would have read and commented it.
C. In fandom, and creative endeavors in general, activity breeds activity. If you see a circle where there's always new content and people are happy to be there, you'll gladly check it out! And you, again, are one of the most positive contributors not just by content but by energy.

Again, I understand feeling responsible for what happens around you, but please consider that your considerable fatigue may be clouding your perspective. Do what you need to get through this difficult moment, but please don't punish yourself for any reason, justified or not.

Ps: I trust Orcish to enforce or at least defime his boundaries. Nobody else should feel responsible for that. And for all his fuzziness and heart, I remember him being plenty capable of speaking up when somebody crossed the line.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2020 8:29 pm 
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I hear what you're saying, and I appreciate the sentiment. I just know that two constants seem to be that we lose good people and that I'm around. I certainly hope it's a false corollary, but I can never know unless our missing friends return and either confirm or deny.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but yeah, Huey is absolutely right, this right here is bull. I will go get on-the-record statements from Ruwin and OL myself it convinces you, since I still have pretty clear avenues of contact to them. Hell, I might even be able to get in touch with Yxoque, too.

You can't go around blaming yourself for some apparent failing of our community, when there's a million and one factors at play. That's just so defeatist. You have multiple people here telling you that you really matter here, so there must be SOMETHING to that. Try imagining it from the other side, for the moment: imagine if you left, meaning one more great voice is gone from our ranks. Nothing is going to magically bring more people in, just because one person is gone. It's just going to leave us more diminished.

I'm sorry if I come across as brusque here, but it's frustrating to me, hearing people I know well and care deeply about talk like that, and I've had to deal with it from more than one person. Stop doing that. Please. You matter. You'll never not matter.


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